Monthly Archives: June 2014

My Free-Thinking Father, for Father’s Day

When I was a wee slip of a girl, around the time I was learning to read, I remember one day being fed up with having to pick up my room, and I said, “I wish there was still slavery.”

Dad had no idea why I said that, so he asked, “Why do you say that?” (Why is my small child a tiny Southern racist?)

“So the slave would pick up my room,” I said.

And Dad asked, “What if you were the slave?” I hadn’t thought of that.

Thanks, Dad, for asking me that question!

Here are a few random reasons I’m glad my dad is who he is:

1. Although he’s over 70, Dad still walks by bouncing on the balls of his feet.

2. Dad dated women his own age instead of girls my age.

3. He coached my soccer team for years, and let us choose our own team name.

4. There used to be a dirty, white tomcat that hung around our house, sometimes sleeping inside during the day when no one was home. It always ran away when any of us came home. One day it got hit by a car, and Dad paid all its medical bills and adopted it.

5. He has a favorite color, and it’s orange.

6. He never let me get away with playing dumb.

7. When I was very little and wanted to play with my big brother’s Tonka trucks, Dad bought me a Tonka dumptruck.

8. Dad encouraged me to have adventures, and I did.

There are more, but I’ll save them. Happy father’s day, Dad!

white cat 80s orange

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Return to Iraq–What Could Go Wrong?

http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2014/06/13/the-seven-people-who-need-to-stfu-about-iraq-right-now/#.U5tf1StV6rM.twitter

“Hush you guys. The guy who thought Sarah Palin would make a good vice-president is explaining to us what we should do in Iraq.”

And do you remember which genius said this, about how long success in Iraq would take: “It could last, you know, six days, six weeks. I doubt six months“?

Giving me an excuse to post this excerpt, which I love:

But imagine if “Donald Rumsfeld” was a wholly imaginary character and that the events recounted in his memoir were audacious fiction, a wicked satire describing an implausible campaign of deceit that ultimately ensnared even the deceivers themselves, leading to a catastrophically lethal blunder in which trillions were squandered and hundreds of thousands slain. Yet despite that all-too-predictable outcome, this fictional narrator with the oddly Dickensian name is unrepentant, effusively praising himself as a hero and a champion of virtue. If it were fiction — the product of conscious artifice rather than of unconscious artifice – Known and Unknown would be on the syllabus of English literature classes everywhere.

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Filed under Our glorious war in Iraq, Stupidity, War in Iraq

“He Looks Like a Muslim”

I hope we don’t all get whiplash, but suddenly we’re supposed to dislike beards. And if you have a full beard, you look like the Taliban.

Taliban

 

Quick quiz: is the above an American icon or a terrible turncoat no-good traitor who is probably a *gasp* Muslim?

 

douche

How about this one?

Okay, so remember: now we all hate beards, as they prove that you are a member of the Taliban.

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Filed under bigoted idiots, movies and shows, Stupidity