“But to think that somebody would be so vicious, so evil as to want to kill little children, and maim families who were there rejoicing in a sporting contest on a beautiful day in Boston, it just makes you sick at your stomach. Don’t talk to me about religion of peace, no way.”

Hunter Davis’s impression of Ian McKellen performing the theme song to Charles in Charge.

Sure, the truncated birth certificate shows he’s legally the son of a human being. But biologically? DNA results are needed.

Now, to be fair to orangutans, Donald Trump’s only real similarity is his shock of orange hair, which he swirls about his head in some kind of misguided mating display. That is, admittedly, orangutan-esque. However, Donald is well known to have short fingers, his face is dismayingly square, and his mouth is miniscule, all of which make him very unlike an orangutan, which has simian grace and beauty.

The most significant proof, which you might have expected Donald Trump to resort to first, is that orangutans and humans cannot breed together to produce offspring. Science, Mr. Trump. That’s why we go to school.

(Please don’t take this as any kind of endorsement of Bill Maher. He still gives off a major ‘creep’ vibe).

No articles seem to mention it, but Papua New Guinea is reportedly 96% Christian.

In our media, even torturing and burning a “sorceress” to death can’t possibly be related to Christianity. But if you’re Muslim, that’s naturally the number one reason for anything bad that you do. Ipso facto.

Exodus 22:18 – Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live.

Leviticus 20:27 – A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood [shall be] upon them.

Here’s a story that’s only in the Arabic-language papers. The U.S. Ambassador to Lebanon, Maura Connelly, visited an ancient historical site near Tyre, and one of the SUVs in her motorcade crushed a small portion of ancient wall. (Or just some wall–the papers I’ve seen so far are not entirely clear). In any case, you can see from the photo that the path is not intended for vehicles.

An English version of the story here: http://www.almanar.com.lb/english/adetails.php?eid=81959&frid=23&seccatid=14&cid=23&fromval=1

With a four-week ad buy in the Shaw, Waterfront, Rockville and Dunn Loring Metro stations, organizer Ahmed Rehab, who is also executive director of the Chicago branch of the Council on American-Islamic Relations, says that he is hoping to change the narrative around the word jihad.

“We kind of got tired sitting there watching people tell us what we believe or what we don’t believe.”

The posters feature photos of Muslims sharing their religious struggles, and uses lines like “my jihad is to build bridges through friendship” and “my jihad: modesty is not a weakness.”

Twelve years after 9/11 and the initial bout of screaming American ignorance, the country’s morons are still as ignorant and still as vocal as ever. Some comments from the WaPo:

You can try to give a newer softer meaning to the word “jihad” but it is too late.
For too many non muslims, the word jihad is associated with terrorism.

This is not a newer, softer meaning. This is the meaning.

Painting Jihad in any other way than getting rid of whoever believes differently is like sprinkling sugar on blood or painting lipstick on a pig’s snout.

“Lipstick on a pig” will always remind me of Sarah Palin.

Jihad means islamic holy war and it has no any other meaning.Jihad in german language is Mein Kampf.
Jihad does not mean to build bridge through friendship.
Jihad is war,jihad means killing infidels/non-muslims.
Jihad is an obligation in House of War/Infidel Country(America,Europe)
Jihad ads at metro stations are Lie Propaganda and Deception

Congratulations, you’re exactly wrong.

But I’m happy to say that the really awful comments I saw the other day have largely been addressed by thoughtful, patient people, and there’s real discussion going on in the comments today.

And people can still see the humor:

My jihad is to get laid this weekend

That’s not quite the meaning, but good luck to you, ma’am.

This is a series of screen caps from an SNL parody ad. Found this on Pleated Jeans.

I love the girl at the beginning who runs away when the fennec fox comes at her. So cute!

This reminds me of an experience not too long ago with a little snow weasel in the woods. Good times.

Edited to add: Because Huckabee is a freaking insane lunatic jackass. And I’ve added this quote to my Fanaticism page. Some great company you’re keeping there, Huckabee.

Found on Jezebel. Follow the link to see the picture.